See, it’s like this.

Only once in every century are we given the perfect opportunity to honor one of the greatest artists and philosophers of our time. This day, this apex of epic riffs, this nirvana of noise, this valhalla of virtuosity, this bodhi of broken eardrums, this moksha of mach, that you know as November 11, 2011, is a once-in-a-generation opportunity to collectively experience the enlightenment of Eleven.

It is a day when we may gather with loved ones and break bread into tinier pieces of bread for small sandwiches. It is a day for the admiration of guitars, and also for the not touching of them. And finally, when the haberdashery plays are all acted, we celebrate the freeing of the enfoiled trouser vegetables.

Oh yes, it is magical!

So tell your friends, tell your neighbors, and tell Randy Gonzalez: Nigel Tufnel Day is coming!